


Facing Your Fears

by blacktithe



Category: Supernatural, Supernatural RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-08-30 20:56:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8548834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blacktithe/pseuds/blacktithe
Summary: A close call leaves you a trembling mess. Can Jared help you move past it and get your life back?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is betaed by my good friend Kari.

 

 

 

 

 

The two of you couldn’t help but laugh at the thought of what could possibly be waiting for you at the Ackles home when you got there. It was the first time Jensen had been completely alone with all three kids while you and Danneel went out for some much needed girl time.

“He’s probably about ready to pull his hair out by now,” you joked after envisioning him trying to feed the twins while JJ dance around the room singing songs from _Tangled_ at the top of her lungs.

“Yeah. Probably,” Danneel offered. “He’s so good with them though. He really is a great dad.”

You gave her a little sideways glance and smile before nodding and returning your attention to the road.

The two of you had decided to go to a play on the other side of town. It was something the two of you had always enjoyed doing together. She liked going to plays with Jensen too, but opportunities to have quality girl time without a passel of tiny humans in tow was nearly impossible these days. Even after Jared had finally asked you to move into his home just down the road from them, there was always a little one in tow. You didn’t mind though. You loved JJ with all your heart, and the twins were so precious you couldn’t help but fawn over them whenever they were around. Still, it was nice to go out with your best friend once in awhile and just let your hair down.

“The set design was amazing,” said Danneel. “The way they moved the pieces around made the space feel huge.”

“I know! I especially loved how they did the abbey.”

“I’m just glad you didn’t try to sing along.”

“Hey,” you said, pointing an admonishing finger in Danneel’s direction. “It’s not my fault that _The Sound of Music_ is so much fun to sing. You like it too. Admit it.”

Daneel nodded her agreement, and the two of you settled into a comfortable silence for a few minutes as you drove along in the left hand lane on your way home. You checked your rear view mirror and noticed something unusual. So you looked into your side mirrors to confirm your suspicion. Somebody in a rather large truck was following you closely, very closely. In fact, the only thing you could see in any of your mirrors was a piece of this truck.

Your muscles tensed, and you sat up a little bit straighter while checking your speedometer. 5 over the speed limit. Nothing wrong there. That was the usual speed you drove on the highway. You checked the mirrors again. This time it looked like they were even closer to your bumper. You went on red alert and straightened up in your seat. Danneel noticed the change in your demeanor and looked behind you.

“What is their problem?” she asked in annoyance.

“I don’t know.” You took a long slow breath to keep yourself calm. You tried to look around the vehicle, but the dark night and bright headlights in your mirrors made it impossible for you to see if anyone was coming to get out of their way. Having someone drive that close to your rear bumper was making you tense. The fact that the guy only seemed to be getting closer made you afraid to take your eyes off of the road for even a second. “Danni, is anyone coming? I can’t see.”

Danneel tried to take a look for you but to no avail. She started shaking her head, saying she couldn’t tell. Apparently this truck was all she could see too.

“They’ll just have to go around me then,” you said, taking another look at your speedometer to see 10 mph over the speed limit, and mutter a curse under your breath. “I’m already speeding.” Going any faster would only make things more dangerous.

There was the tiniest bit of edginess to your voice. Taking a deep breath, you focused back on the road in front of you and tried to ignore the idiot behind you.

You saw your friend shift uncomfortably in her set and tug on her seat belt to make sure it was as tight as possible. Tension continued to mount in the car as the seconds passed. You heard the sudden rev of an engine and looked to your left to see the large red truck passing you in the grass on the left-hand side.

The first thought that came to you was that they were nuts. The second was that they could spin out and go careening into your car. Driving 70+ mph on soil was an easy way to end up causing a wreck. The thought terrified you. If they spun out and struck your side of the car, it would force Danneel’s side into the other lanes of traffic, sandwiching you both in a hunk of twisted metal. So you took your foot of the gas so he could get ahead of you. You didn’t hit the brakes. You were afraid to. What if somebody else came up behind you too quickly and slammed into you from behind? If it had been just you in the car you might not have been as worried, but you had Danneel to worry about. Getting her home safely to her husband and children was your top priority. Brief flashes of the two of you trapped in your overturned car went through your head, but you shook your head to clear them away so you could focus on what needed to be done.

He drove back over into the lane in front of you and slowed to a near complete stop before taking off like a shot.

“May all your bacon burn,” you muttered before flipping them the bird. “Crazy asshole.”

“No kidding,” Danneel offered.

The tension in the vehicle quickly started dissipating, but you kept an eye on the truck in front of you just to be safe. You let your muscles relax and sank back into your seat as you drove, happy to no longer have someone on your tail. Then you saw him move into the middle lane and start swerving dangerously across the lane lines. Something was wrong. Slowing down, you tried to keep the erratic driver in front of you, but you were slowing down to the point of near ridiculousness in order to do so.

“I’m just going to go past him,” you told Danneel. “I don’t want to be near him driving like that.”

Danneel nodded and kept an eye on the truck as you moved forward with caution. Curiosity rose in you as you neared. You wanted to see who it was that was driving like a maniac. So you glanced over as you passed by. What you saw was entirely unexpected.

A young man, no older than his late twenties, was glowering over at you with his window down. He started screaming at you and waving like he wanted you to pull over. ‘Yeah. No,’ you thought. ‘That’s never gonna happen.’ Danneel shifted nervously in her seat and went back to facing forward. You decided it was best to follow her lead and just ignore him. The fact that he thought he could actually order you to pull over for no damn reason pissed you off. You’d done nothing wrong. He was the one that couldn’t apparently deal with having to drive anything less than mach 1.

BANG!

You jumped in your seat and turned your head just in time to see him speed off.

“He just threw something at us!” Danneel exclaimed, her mouth hanging open in astonishment.

Your mind suddenly went into overdrive. There was something going on here. This man was dangerous, and you had to let somebody know about it.

“Danni,” you said. “Can you get his tag for me please. I want to let the cops know they’ve got a crazy person out here.”

Danneel nodded and started digging through her purse for her phone. Your brain started running at lightning speed, taking notes of all of the cross streets and exit numbers you passed while still keeping your driver in sight. The more details you could give the cops, the more likely they would be to catch him.

“Ugh,” you heard Danneel groan in frustration. You chanced a quick glance over at her and saw her holding up her phone.  “I can’t get a good shot of it.” She started digging in her purse again. “I guess I’ll just have to write it down.”

She went back to digging in her purse, but you kept your eyes on the truck, watching as it once again slowed down to get alongside you. You’d thought it was over. He’d made his displeasure known and drove off, but you were wrong.

A knot started to form in the pit of your stomach as you came up next to the truck once more. There were a thousand and one scenarios running through your mind, and all of them ended badly. As big of a threat as he was to you, the more immediate danger was to Danneel. She was on the side of the vehicle nearest to him. If he decided to become more violent, she would be the one to receive his attentions first. You tried to force those thoughts from your mind and keep your eyes focused on the road. Engaging him would only make things worse. You knew that, but your curiosity got the better of you once more. You chanced a quick glance and saw him doing much the same thing he had before. You turned your eyes back to the road and focused on the blacktop in front of you. You tried to act like there was nothing in existence but you and it. Just focus on the road in front of you, and everything will be fine. Panicking would only make things worse. Cool, calm, and collected. That’s how you were going to get through this.

BANG!

He threw something into the side of your car again and took off. The loud bang startled you and sent your heart racing. The sound had been so loud you’d almost thought it had been bullet from a gun. It was too dark to see what he threw at you, but whatever it was had to of done some damage.

Danneel jumped in her seat and quickly gave up her search for a piece of paper and jotted the tag number down on her palm before calling the cops. You could hear the hitch in her breathing as she fought back tears, and it suddenly threw everything into perspective. Everything slowed down as you watched him speed away from you again. Things became clearer. You took in every detail around you. Your brain registered Danneel’s growing frustration from her spot beside you.

“You okay over there Danneel?” There was some hesitancy to your voice. You didn’t see Danneel lose her cool like this very often.

“I can’t get it to go through,” she said as she tried and failed for the third time to get *55 to connect her to the highway patrol’s dispatch.

“It’s okay. Breath.” She took a slow breath. You had to find a way to keep her calm. You couldn’t worry about her and make sure this guy didn’t force you off the road. You needed her to keep it together. So you flipped the switch in your mind and took over. “Try googling it.”

“Good idea.”

You kept your eyes trained on the truck as it moved over in front of you. Taking your foot off of the gas, you started preparing for him to stop again, but instead he raced ahead about a mile and a half before pulling over on the left-hand side of the road and stopped.

“Ssshit,” you hissed. You didn’t know what he was up to, but there was no way it could be good. Taking a quick glance over your right shoulder, you put on your turn signal and started switching lanes. “I’m getting over.”

“Why won’t this work?” Danneel cried in frustration, still unable to get anyone on the phone.

Checking once more to make sure the coast was clear, you started making your way across lanes of traffic to put some space between you and your attacker. The fact that this man kept going after you was starting to scare you. You didn’t know who he was or why he was doing this, but it was clear that he was not going to stop. You just hoped that by getting over into the right-hand lane you could put enough distance between the two of you to get away before he could get back on the road and give chase.

CRASH.

There was a loud crack, followed by Danneel’s high pitched scream as your windshield suddenly broke. It took every ounce of control you possessed to keep from swerving dangerously into another lane or the concrete barrier beside you.

‘Oh my God,’ you thought as your heart began to race. Looking over, you could see the man standing near the tailgate of his truck, shouting and waving at you from across the lanes of traffic.

“Danneel,” you said in what you hoped was calm and collected manner, fighting against the rising panic in your chest. You had to keep a level head, or everything was going to go south very quickly. “Just call 9-1-1. They’ll put you through to whoever we need. Tell them I’m taking the next exit. I don’t want this guy to keep following us.” She nodded and quickly dialed the number.

True to your word, you moved into the next exit lane as soon as it appeared. It would take you in the opposite direction from the safety of your home, but it was probably for the best. The last thing you wanted was for this madman to find out where you or Danneel lived. Your thoughts immediately went to JJ and the twins. What if he followed you and decided to go after them? You pictured him stalking your friends family and just laying in wait for the perfect moment to strike. You pictured JJ’s blonde pigtails stained red with blood. The twins lying wide-eyed and motionless as Jensen cried over them. You checked your mirrors again and gave a mental sigh of relief when you didn’t see him behind you.

“Yes, hello,” Danneel’s panicked voice came from beside you. “There is a guy out here on the highway throwing things at us.” The dispatcher must have asked her a question about where you were because she suddenly started stumbling over her words. “Uh, we… we are on.”

Her harried state of mind was making it impossible for her to even tell them what highway you were exiting off of. Your instincts took over, and you started dictating everything to Danneel to relay to the dispatcher. You gave her the road you were on, the direction you were headed, and the exit number you had just turned onto. She gave the dispatcher all of the information as you had given it to her, carefully recounting your tale as you prompted her with the street signs and landmarks you had noted before.

You kept taking not of passing streets and mile markers as you drove. There was no clear destination in your mind. You were just driving. You just wanted to put as must distance between you and your attacker as possible. Checking your mirrors again, you were grateful to see that there was still no sign of him or anyone else on the road behind you. The muscles in your neck and shoulder started to relax ever so slightly.

“Um, I don’t know,” Danneel said. She turned to you. “Where are we going? They are sending an officer to us.”

There was a 24 hour gas station and convenience store about two miles east of you. It was well lit and people were always there. People meant witnesses, and witnesses meant safety. Turning left at the next street you came to, you told Danneel to have the officer meet you there.

Your heartbeat was still thundering in your ears when you pulled into the parking lot, taking a space near the front door where you could see the clerk and they could clearly see you before cutting the ignition. A red truck pulled in a few spaces down from you and you froze. It was newer than the one that had been following you earlier, but it still put you on alert all the same. It wasn’t until you saw the driver get out and walk inside that you actually relaxed.

“You probably ought to text Jay and let him know we’ll be a bit,” you said. Danneel had called him earlier to let him know that you were on your way home. Knowing Jensen, if you were late getting there he would freak out and blow up your phones until someone answered or send a search party to look for you. Danneel nodded and grabbed her phone. “Tell him I’m sorry I’m keeping you out so late,” you added.

You weren’t really sure why you felt like you needed to apologize. It was an automatic response, something to do that made you feel a little bit better while you waited. Something that made you feel like you were actually doing something instead of waiting for rescue to arrive. You hated feeling useless, and that’s exactly what you were in that moment. The realization of what could have happened started to sink in. That man could have easily tried to run you off the road, or heaven forbid he had had a gun. You leaned your head back against your seat and closed your eyes, trying to force the errant thoughts from you mind. Your hands slipped from the steering wheel as they slowly started to tremble when the adrenaline began wearing off.

“Hey babe. No we’re fine.” You turned your head to the side to see Danneel talking on the phone with who you could only assume was her husband. “I promise.” She looked over at you and saw that you were clasping your hands in your lap to hide the shaking. She gave you a concerned look, but you quickly dispelled her worry by mouthing the word adrenaline. She nodded in understanding and went back to her conversation. “No. We’re waiting for the cops now.” She nodded as she listened to Jensen on the other end of the line. “Okay. We will.”

She ended the call and put her phone away.

“You okay, Danni?” you asked.

You knew the answer. She was just as shaken up by the whole ordeal as you were, if not more, but you needed something to distract yourself.

She nodded. “I’m fine.” The small shake in her voice betrayed the anxiety she was still feeling. You reached over and squeezed her hand reassuringly before clasping it in your lap once more so she couldn’t feel your trembling. You needed to reassure her. Not worry her even more.

The more time that passed, the more adrenaline wore off, and the harder it became to control your shaking. As soon as your hands were under control, your leg would start. If you got that to stop, it would be your shoulders.

“Yeah. I’m okay.” She noticed your shaking and placed a hand on your shoulder. “How are you?”

You quickly brushed off the clear concern in her voice and assured her you were fine.

“I’m okay. Just the adrenaline. I’ll be fine.” You gestured towards your damaged windshield. “I’m more worried about what it will take to fix my car.” You briefly thought about getting out of your car to check for damage to the side of your vehicle, but the thought of getting out of the car terrified you.

Danneel looked like she was going to fight you on it, but her attention was quickly drawn to something outside of your window. You followed her gaze and saw the highway patrol officer pulling in and parking just a couple of spots away from you. You body sagged, taking solace in the fact that the two of you were no longer alone.

* * *

All you wanted to do after talking to the officer was go back to your home and curl up in bed, but Danneel would have none of it. She insisted that you come inside for a bit, maybe have a glass of water or even some wine before going home.

“Jay is going to want to make sure you’re okay with his own eyes,” she said. “You know he tends to get a little overprotective of you when Jared is out of town.”

It was true. The four of you were a very close knit bunch. Any time either of the boys was home without the other, they always looked in on the other’s family.  You started to protest when Danneel gave you the raised eyebrow look she had learned from her husband, a look that got you to cave every single time.

“Okay. I’ll come in for just a minute.”

Your right hand still shook slightly when you reached for the door handle. You chanced a glance over and Danneel to see if she had noticed, but luckily she was looking the other way. Your legs shook a little as you took your first couple of steps in much the same way they had when you’d visited with the officer, but you quickly righted yourself and had little problem getting to the door. You stopped part way to check on the side of your car and groaned when you saw a few scratches and dings there as well.

The two of you were barely inside the door before Jensen had scooped Danneel into a bone crushing hug.

“Thank God you’re okay honey,” he said before pulling away enough to place a sound kiss on her lips, grateful she was alright. With her face still in his hands, he turned his attention to you. “Hey sweetheart. How are you holding up?” He crossed the few feet between you and pulled you into a comforting hug.

“I’m fine Jensen,” you said. “It’s my car I’m worried about.”

He guided you to the living room and gestured for you to have a seat on the couch.

“Have you called Jared yet?” he asked.

You shook your head no.

“There’s no need to bother him while he’s at work,” you said. “Danni and I are both fine.”

“He’s going to want to know about this Y/N.”

“I know. I’ll just give him a call in the morning. I promise. There’s nothing he can do anyway. So why worry him. If I call him now it will just stress him out, and there’s no need for that.”

Calling Jared was actually exactly what you wanted to do. You wanted nothing more than to hear his warm silvery voice telling you that everything was going to be alright. You wanted to curl up against his chest and take comfort in the strength of his arms, but that wasn’t an option. He was still filming for a few more days before the break started. You were just going to have to manage until then. Weakness was never something you liked showing to anyone. You always did your best to be strong and stand on your own two feet. That’s part of why it took so long for Jared to work up the courage to ask you out. He said you were intimidating because you we so strong. Well, you didn’t intend to change that now.

“Y/N…” Jensen scolded.

“Don’t,” you warned, holding up a hand to silence him. “It won’t do any good.”

Jensen nodded. He knew that there was no changing your mind once it was set. So he decided to let it go for now.

“So what exactly happened?”

You recounted the details of your encounter while Danneel went to get the two of you a drink. Going through the details again was making you tense up, but you did your best to play it off by using your hands a bit more than normal while you talked to help hid your trembling.

Danneel came back in just as you were finishing up and handed you a glass of wine. “Here you go.”

“Thanks.”

You reached out and took the glass with a grateful smile. Despite your best efforts, your hand visibly trembled as you lifted it to your lips. Both Jensen and Danneel noticed. They exchanged a knowing look. It had been nearly an hour since the whole incident ended. Any shakiness the adrenaline had caused would have long since passed. This was obviously something more.

Taking a sip of the wine, you couldn’t help but smile at the familiar taste. It was Jared’s brand. The fact that Danneel would chose something of his to help calm you made you feel a little bit better.

“Y/N,” her kind voice rang out, “why don’t you stay here with us tonight? We’ve got more than enough room, and I’m sure JJ and the twins would love to have breakfast with their favorite aunt.”

The offer was sweet, but you knew you couldn’t accept it.

“No. I’m okay.” They both gave you disbelieving looks. “Seriously guys,” you chuckled. “I’m fine. Besides, I just live down the street.”

Jensen leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and clasped his hands in front of him. “I’m not sure it’s a good idea for you to be alone right now, Y/N.” His forest green eyes traveled up to meet your y/e/c ones. The concern you found there made you grateful to have him as your friend. Still, you couldn’t accept the offer. Accepting the offer meant that there was something wrong, and admitting that meant you couldn’t handle it on you own.

“I won’t be alone,” you said. “I’ll have Sadie with me.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

You gulped at the authoritative tone in his voice. It was something you never liked to have directed towards you. You felt bad enough for JJ when he used it on her. You knew that he wasn’t upset with you, just concerned. You were grateful for that, but that didn’t change the fact that you wanted to do this on your own. Everything was over. It was fine. All you needed was a good night’s sleep, and all would be forgotten.

“I’ll be fine.” You gave them both your most reassuring smile. “Really. I promise.” Neither of your friends looked like they really believed you. “And I promise I’ll call Jared first thing in the morning.” You looked down at your watch. “If he’s not still filming he’s asleep, and I don’t want to wake him.”

There was still some tension in the room, but that seemed to appease them for now. You finished the rest of your wine and thanked them once again for the offer of a room for the night, but you wanted to get home to your fur babies and your own bed. Danneel gave you a hug and told you to call them if you changed your mind. Jensen just gave you a disgruntled look before pulling you into a brief hug. He placed a brotherly kiss to your temple and told you to take care of yourself.

“I will.”

You waved goodbye to the both of them before climbing into your car and driving the two blocks to your own home. The instant you were alone, all of the feelings that you had been pushing down for the last few hours started to bubble to the surface. Every ounce of fear and panic you had pushed aside for Danneel’s sake came rushing to the surface. You were shaking so badly by the time you went to open the door leading from the garage to the house that you had to hold the key in both hands in order to get it in the lock.

A rather large happy hound greeted you the instant you stepped inside.

“Hey,” you said before entering the code to deactivate the alarm. “You ready to go outside?”

She started clamoring excitedly towards the back door. You shook your head at her before following her to the sliding glass door that lead to your backyard and let her outside to tinkle before going to bed for the night.

You wandered into the kitchen and sat your things on the counter. A giant weight fell from your shoulder, and you collapsed against it. The granite felt cool against your skin and helped give you something to focus on other than your whirling emotions. You could feel the tears begin to sting at the back of your eyes and thought seriously about just calling Jared, but you forced yourself to stand up and shove the anxiety to the back of your mind.

“It’s okay, Y/N,” you said to the empty house. “You’ve got this. It’s all over. You’re fine. Danneel’s fine. Everybody is just fine. Just calm down.”

While your head seemed to get that, your heart wasn’t quite willing to embrace it just yet.

A scratching sound at the back door alerted you to the fact that your dog was ready to come back inside. So you made your way over to the door and let her in, giving her a treat for being so good as you went about resetting the alarm and making your way up the stairs towards your bedroom with the dog close on your heels.

You quickly stripped out of your clothes from the evening and reached into the drawer for your pajamas. Your hand paused as it fluttered over the fabric. Quickly shutting the drawer, you walked over to Jared’s closet and grabbed one of his shirts instead. Slipping it over your head, you inhaled his scent and let it calm you somewhat before crawling into the bed with Sadie curling up beside you.

Something about laying down forced your body into overdrive. You started shaking and shivering like an earthquake was happening inside of you. You laid there for hours trying to force yourself to relax, just waiting for the shaking to stop, but it didn’t work. You glanced at your phone on the nightstand and once again thought about calling Jared. Even having your mutt in the bed with you wouldn’t make the shivers stop racking your body. You started to reach out for the phone, but your hand was shaking so badly you didn’t think you could dial. Chastising yourself for your weakness, you reminded yourself that he would only worry about you if he heard you like this. No doubt by now the shaking would be evident in your voice. He would hear it and immediately demand they let him go home. You couldn’t let him jeopardize his career like that. So you pulled your arm back under the covers and tried to sleep some more. You eventually gave up and grabbed another blanket to throw over your body, hoping that would be enough to stop the onslaught so that you could finally get some sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared is home. Now you just have to convince him that everything is okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story was betad by my dear friend Kari.

“Ah!”

You startled awake for what felt like the millionth time since trying to go to bed. Every time you closed your eyes, you relived the nights events in horrifying detail. Some of the details changed here and there, but the altered details only made you even more fearful until you woke in a cold sweat shaking and shivering all over again. It took several minutes each time for the nauseated feeling the images in your dream caused to fade away before you could try to sleep again. Your body was still shaking somewhat from the last nightmare you’d had when you looked at the clock and saw that it was nearly 7am. Still early, but late enough that you wouldn’t feel too terrible for giving up on sleep for the time being. Maybe you could take Sadie for a run and wear yourself out so that you could get some rest.

The giant mutt lying beside you nuzzled your hand with her head as she crawled a little closer. She let out a small whimper, her big doe eyes looking sadly up at you in concern. You reached over and gave her a gentle scratch behind the ears.

“I’m alright girl.”

Sadie just licked you land and placed her head in your lap.

All of the tossing and turning from the night before had caused Jared’s shirt to ride up and become horribly twisted around your body, making it nearly impossible to move. You wrestled the shirt into submission and sat up with a yawn, running a hand down your face before toying with the hem of the shirt.

You had hoped that Jared’s scent lingering on the fabric would have been enough to help you sleep, but it had fallen short. Jared. You’d promised Jensen that you were going to call him when you got up, but you didn’t want to. Talking to him on the phone about everything but not being able to partake of the comfort you always found in his arms would be torture. He wasn’t scheduled to be home until tomorrow. His plane would land at a quarter to three. Then you could finally just relax and let him be your strength for a while.

The stern look Jensen had given you last night when you had refused to call your boyfriend ran through your mind. It was moments like this you wished he was a little less like your big brother and just your boyfriends best friend. With a sigh, you reached for your phone on the bedside table and groaned. It was dead. You’d have to let it charge for at least an hour before you made the call. Otherwise it would just die part way through.

You were just about to crawl out of bed when Sadie’s ears suddenly perked up. Her head shot up off of your lap before she slowly got to her feet.

“What is it girl?”

That’s when you heard what sounded like a door opening down stairs.

“Y/N?” a familiar voice called out to you. “Babe, I’m home.”

Sadie was off like a rocket at the sound of her daddy’s voice. You were a little more slow to follow. You were confused. He wasn’t due home yet. Had your lack of sleep started making you hear things? But that was crazy. Sadie wouldn’t react that way if it was all in your head would she?

After taking a quick look at yourself in the mirror, you carefully made your way downstairs and followed the sound of Sadie’s nails clacking on the hardwood floor and Jared’s hearty laughter at her undoubted excitement at seeing him. You turned the corner at the base of the stairs and saw Jared crouched down in front of the dog, rubbing her ears, and speaking gibberish to her.

“Jared?” you asked while continuing to move forward. “What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t coming home until tomorrow.”

The smile slowly melted from his face as he looked from the overly excited canine to your face. The joy he had exhibited moments before was quickly replaced with concern.

“Jensen called me,” he said as he made his way towards you. “He said you and Danneel were attacked. Then when I tried to call you didn’t answer. So I got worried and took the next flight out.” He’d reached you buy that point and wasted no time in enveloping your much smaller frame in his arms, pulling you tightly against his chest. “Are you okay?’

Your body sagged into his, and let his radiating warmth spread throughout your body.

“I am now.”

Taking hold of the front of his shirt, you buried your face in his chest and inhaled his scent. It made you feel safe and warm, driving away all of the ghosts from the terrors the night had brought.

Jared pulled away to get a better look at you, checking you for any sign of injury or distress. Finding none, he trained his hazel eyes on your y/e/c ones.

“Why didn’t you answer when I called?,” he asked, his voice laced with concern. “Your phone went straight to voicemail. I got worried.”

“I’m sorry,” you apologized with a bashful smile. “I forgot to put it on the charger and it died. I was planning on calling you this morning once it charged up some.”

His hands started fluttering all over your body once more to reassure himself that you were alright.

“Jared,” you chuckled, “I’m okay. Really.”

He didn’t look convinced. If anything, he looked pissed. You couldn’t say you blamed him. You would be absolutely seething in the tables were turned. He could clearly see the exhaustion on your face, but perhaps that wouldn’t be an issue.

“I saw the car, Y/N,” he said in an accusatory voice, crossing his arms over his chest. “And Jensen told me how shaken up Danneel was. Now I know you’re tough, but I know there is no way you could go through something like that and not be shook up. So why don’t you tell me what is really going on?”

He was hurt. Now that you were in front of him and clearly unscathed, he wanted an explanation as to why he had to hear what had happened from his best friend instead of you. More than that, he had tried to ease his own fears by speaking to you, but you had been too wrapped up in your own mind to think to charge you phone.

You could feel tears sting at the back of your eyes, but you refused to let them fall. Jared didn’t deserve your frailty. That would only make him feel sorry for you. That wouldn’t fix anything. So you lied. You downplayed everything as much as you could without changing the story he had undoubtedly heard from Jensen already.

“I think Danni was just a little more freaked out since he was on her side of the car you know. I can’t blame her. I was pretty worried for a minute there until we got off the highway.”

A little line formed between Jared’s eyebrows as they knit together, the concern and worry he felt for you clearly written all over his face. He took a step closer and reached up to run his thumb along your cheek.

“Why didn’t you call me?” he pleaded.

You nuzzled into his hand. “Because I didn’t want you to worry about me.” The frown lines on his face only deepened. You’re heart swelled with love for the amazing man standing in front of you. Reaching up. You ran you fingers through his hair before sliding your index finger down the ridge in his forehead. “Kind of like you are now.”

He let out a little huff of a chuckle, the corner of his mouth twitching up into the briefest of smiles.

“Just don’t scare me like that okay?” he asked with unease in his voice. Pulling you flush against his chest, he wrapped his strong arms around you and enveloped you in the comfort you had craved all night long. “My mind went crazy when I couldn’t get ahold of you. Then when I saw your car.. I- just…”

“It’s okay,” you said, breathing him in and clinging to him so tightly you almost expected to hear his shirt ripping.

“I’m just glad you’re okay,” Jared whispered

“So am I.”

The two of you stood like that for several long minutes. Neither of you spoke. You just held the other and enjoyed the feel of being back together again. You sagged into him further, and all of the emotion from the night before started working it’s way up into your chest threatening to overwhelm you. You couldn’t let that happen. Jared was already worried about you enough. It would pass. Just give it some time, and it will pass.

Pulling away before he could feel you start to tremble, you gave him the most radiant smile you could muster.

“Want some breakfast?”

You went up onto your tiptoes to place a kiss to the underside of his jaw before turning and wandering into the kitchen to avoid what was sure to be an unavoidable conversation.

* * *

A pair of strong arms wrapped around your middle as you placed a few more pieces of bacon into the hot skillet.

“Smells good,” Jared’s melodic voice sounded in your ear before his lips connected with the skin of your exposed neck.

You were still wearing only his shirt and panties, and from the feeling at your back, he rather enjoyed the sight.

“Stop,” you chuckled, trying to pull out of his grasp. “You’re going to make me burn the bacon.”

“Then just take it off the stove.”

His teeth grazed along the base of your neck causing you to shiver in delight and forget all of your worries for a brief moment in time. You leaned farther into his chest and reached up to tangle your fingers in his shower dampened hair. Turning your attention from the breakfast cooking in front of you, you slid your lips along his. A groan escaped you when his tongue slipped past your lips to glide across your own. You started reaching blindly for the nob on the stove to turn off the heat when a shrill ringing sounded in your ears.

Jared sighed before reluctantly pulling away to retrieve his ringing phone, grumbling something about never catching a break as he went. Picking it up off of the breakfast bar, he looked at the caller id for a moment before answering the call.

“Hey man. What’s up?”

Some of the grease from the sizzling bacon popped and hit you on the hand. Pulling back sharply, you made a disgruntled face before reaching for the fried strip of pork and putting it on a plate with a few eggs before starting on the toast. You put two pieces of bread in the toaster and turned to look at Jared.

He was seated on the opposite side of the breakfast bar, phone to his ear, nodding as who you could only assume was Jensen spoke.

“Okay. yeah sure. I’ll let her know.” He looked up at you and sent you a little half smile before telling his friend he would see him later and ending the call.

The toast popped up. You placed it on the plates before grabbing a couple forks and carrying the breakfast feast over to the bar.

“What did Jensen want?” you asked as you sat the plate in front of him.

Jared picked up his fork and shoveled a forkful of egg into his mouth before speaking.

“Checking on you,” he said around a mouth full of food before swallowing. “D had a pretty rough night. So he wanted to make sure I got in and that you were fine since you weren’t answering your phone.”

You couldn’t help but shake your head at Jensen. He really was a great friend. Although, he was a little overbearing at times. It was something you both loved and hated him for. Heaven help the poor boy that takes his girls out on their first dates.

“Did you tell him that my phone died?” you asked before taking a bite out of a strip of bacon.

Jared nodded. “Yeah.” He finished off his eggs and moved to the buttered toast. “He invited us over later. Thought it might be a good idea for us all to just hang out together for a while. Swim with the kids. Eat some hotdogs. Just spend some time together ya know?”

You nodded. “Sounds like fun.” It honestly did sound like a wonderful afternoon, but the lack of sleep from the night before was catching up to you. A long slow yawn came from far in the back of your throat. You tried to stifle it, but it was still pretty obvious. You could feel Jared’s eyes on you after that, so you turned your attention to him and smiled. The same worry lines that had been etched into his face earlier suddenly appeared again, and your smile went away.

“We don’t have to go, babe,” he offered in the most sincere and caring tone you had ever heard. He reached across the bar and took your hand. “We can just stay in. Order some pizza and watch some Netflix. We don’t even have to get dressed if you don’t want to.”

“If I don’t want to?” you joked.

It was clear that he wasn’t completely over his worries in regard to your current state. This was exactly what you had been trying to avoid. Jared would chew all of the flavor out of the problem and stick behind his ear for later when he didn’t think you were paying attention anymore. You loved the fact that he worried about you. You just didn’t want him to make himself sick over it.

Jared gave a little shrug and half smile before running his thumb across the back of your hand and becoming serious once more.

“I mean it Y/N. You look exhausted. If you’d rather just stay home say the word, and I’ll call Jay to let him know. He’ll understand.”

You couldn’t imagine loving him any more at that moment. The love and care he had for you was so clear on his face that it nearly brought tears to your eyes. Returning his worried expression with a soft smile, you lean forward and placed a kiss on the hand that held your own.

“I’m good. Sadie just decided to chase rabbits in her sleep last night,” you lied. Jared broke into a laugh as he envisioned his dog kicking you in her sleep all night.

“Let’s finish breakfast and then I’ll get cleaned up so we can grab some supplies before heading over okay?”

You felt bad about lying to him. He was being so sweet about everything, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to lay this burden on him. The thought of staying cooped up all day with Jared was wonderful, but you feared that being alone with him for that long would cause you to break. The man had a way of getting you to speak whatever was on your mind without him having to utter a word. You’d end up a blubbering mess before the day was over. That’s why Jared’s answer made you relax so much.

“Okay.”

He gave you the warmest of sweet smiles before leaning across the bar to place a sweet kiss on your lips. You couldn’t help but smile at him as he pulled away. That smile quickly turned into a face of shock however when he stole a piece of bacon off your plate and popped it into his mouth. Smacking him playfully on the shoulder, you sent him a mock look of anger that only sent him into a full body laugh you couldn’t help but smile at.

* * *

A rare summer breeze moved through the air as Jared passed Jensen another beer from the cooler the two of you had brought along for the afternoon.

“Thanks man,” Jensen said before flipping one of the burgers and listening to it sizzle on the hot grill.

“No problem.”

Jared turned his attention to you playing in the pool with JJ. The little girl kept squealing and laughing each time you splashed her with the cool water or tossed her into the air. It always amazed him how wonderful you were with her and the twins. You were a natural. A little smile played at the corner of his mouth at the thought of what you would be like with your own children someday. He started to lose himself in thoughts of you holding a little boy or girl with your y/h/c and his hazel eyes Jensen’s voice broke into his daydream.

“How’s she holding up?” he asked, nodding towards you.

Jared didn’t have to ask what he was referring to. It was something that had weighed heavily on his mind all day.

“She says she’s okay, but…”

“You don’t believe her?” Jensen questioned .

“I don’t know,” Jared said with a shrug. There had been multiple times through the afternoon when he had caught you looking dazed when you didn’t think anyone was looking. The second you caught somebody looked your way you put on a smile and went back to acting like everything was normal. It could just be that you were tired, but something in his gut told him it was something more. “She said she didn’t really sleep last night because Sadie kept kicking her, but I’m not so sure.”

“Yeah.” Jensen took a long hard pull on his beer. His eyes traveled over to his wife sitting under an awning feeding one of the twins. “D barely slept at all.”

Jared picked at the label on his beer bottle, unsure how to phrase his next statement. He didn’t want to piss off his best friend, but he didn’t want to accept that his girlfriend was lying to him either.

“Y/N said she thought Danneel was just more freaked out than she was since he was on her side of the car.”

He cast a sidelong glance at his friend and waited for a response.

“No man,” Jensen said with a shake of his head. “That’s not it. She was just as shaken as DeeDee was.” Jared sent him a questioning gaze. “She tried to cover it up, but you could tell it scared the shit out of her too.”

Jared listened quietly as Jensen explained the way you had acted at their house after it was all over. He listened to Jensen tell him about how, while you had sounded calm, you hands had trembled when you’d reached for the wine glass and your “reassuring” smile hadn’t quite reached your eyes.

“We’ve known her for what, 6 years now?” Jensen asked.

Jared nodded. “Yeah something like that.”

“You know as well as I do that she thinks she’s got to be Wonder Woman to keep everyone happy,”Jensen sighed. He loved you like his little sister, but he couldn’t help but be frustrated by you at times. “We’ll just have to wait until she is ready I guess.”

A small twinge of guilt went through Jared at just how accurate those words were. For as long as he had know you, anytime something happened in your life you had always tried to just take care of it yourself. You were always trying to look out for everyone else and their well being. He thought you had finally reached a point with him where you didn’t feel like you had to do that anymore. Apparently he was mistaken. It hurt his heart to think that you couldn’t trust him with this. He couldn’t help but think that he had failed you in some small way.

“I don’t know what to do,” Jared sighed before finishing his beer and sitting it on the table at his side, feeling utterly defeated. He watched you climb out of the pool and help JJ dry off so you all could eat. “I can’t force her to talk to me if she doesn’t want to.”

Jensen clapped him on the shoulder and did his best to reassure him that all he had to do was be there for you. “She’ll talk when she’s ready,” he said. “Just be there for her. She knows you love her, and when she’s ready, she’ll come to you.”

With a grateful nod, Jared left his friend and moved around the pool to your side where he could wrap you in his arms. He would be there for you physically for now and just hope that you would let him be there emotionally when the time came.

* * *

Crawling into bed after a long day in the sun felt wonderful. You’d spent the majority of the day playing with JJ and trying to force yourself to the point of utter exhaustion. There was no way you were going to lay awake all night again. Jared would know that something was up if you did, and you didn’t want to worry him anymore than you already had.

“Decided my shirts aren’t good enough for you now huh?” Jared teased as he crawled into bed beside you.

“You’d rather I sleep in your clothes huh?” you asked playfully

He reached across the bed pulled you towards him, his large warm hand instantly finding the exposed skin at the small of your back.

“You know I love it when you wear my clothes.”

Jared leaned it while simultaneously pulling you tight to his body. A deep guttural groan from deep within his chest was swallowed up by your kisses as he ran his hands along your curves. You pulled away slightly to take in a gasp of air, but instead you found yourself yawning in exhaustion.

You blushed violently red and buried your face in his shoulder as he laughed at your embarrassment.

“Get some sleep,” he finally said in between chuckles. “I want to be able to wear you out again in the morning.”

Smiling at his flirtations, you rested your head against his chest and let the sound of his steadily beating heart lull you to sleep.

* * *

_The man screamed at you to pull over, waving his arms in a violent gesture that you struggled to ignore. You could see Danneel frantically trying to call the police out of the corner of your eye, but you were to afraid to tear your eyes away from the road. A loud crack and the sound of glass breaking sounded through the car. It was so loud that it left you slightly disoriented, your ears ringing._

_Looking over to check on Danneel, your heart nearly stopped in it’s chest._

_“Danni!” you screeched, but she didn’t respond. She was too busy choking on her own blood to respond, her hand trying to stem the flow of blood coming from her neck.  
_

_Your breathing began coming in short bursts that made it nearly impossible for you to keep focus. Off in the distance, you saw the truck growing larger and larger in front of you as it slowed down once more._

_Pressing the bluetooth control button on your steering wheel, you shouted “CALL 9-1-1!!” at the top of your lungs as you fought to keep the quickly rising hysteria from taking over your mind._

_“9-1-1. What’s your emergency?”_

_“Hello,” you cried. “I- I need help. There is a man out here. He has a gun and…” You glanced over at Danneel, her head lulled to the side. Her once warm brown eyes were now hollow and vacant as they stared unblinkingly at you. The enraged driver pulled up alongside of you once more. You looked up at him through the bullet hole in the glass that perfectly matched the one in your friends neck. “Oh God!” He jerked his vehicle into the side of your own._

_“Ma’am? Ma’am, what’s happening?”_

_You were too busy trying to keep your car on the road as he slammed into you again to answer the dispatcher’s question. You fought with all you had to keep your car on the road, but it was no use. It careened onto the grassy shoulder. All control you had over the vehicle suddenly stopped. You could feel yourself becoming weightless as your car began flipping, tossing you around like a rag doll. Shattered glass cut into your skin as the sickening crunch of metal filled your ears. All while the dispatcher kept calling to you._

_“Ma’am? Ma’am? Y/N!”_

* * *

“Y/N!”

You gasped awake and bolted upright in bed. Your mind started scrambling, desperately trying to make sense of where you were. It wasn’t until a pair of strong hands took hold of your face and forced you to look into a familiar pair of hazel eyes that you realized where you were.

“Y/N!” Jared shouted, shaking you lightly to get your attention. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”

Unable to hold it in anymore, you fell against Jared’s chest and started to sob. You cling to him desperately as all of the fear and worry from the last 24 hours poured from you in a torrent of tears.

Jared pulled you close and just let you cry. He didn’t probe. Didn’t ask questions. Didn’t try to get you to talk to him about what was happening. He just held you and whispered soothing words of comfort and safety into your hair as you wept into his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave comments and kudos.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Despite your best efforts, fear is still ruling your life. Jared is done watching it destroy you and decides to help you face it head on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my friend Kari for betaing this for me.

_Two Weeks Later_

Telling Jared everything that had happened had lifted a huge weight off of your shoulders. You were getting your car back from the body shop tomorrow, and things were starting to feel a bit more normal. The only thing you were waiting on was word from the police as to whether or not assault charges were actually going to be filed against your attacker. You’d called them for an update about a week ago, but they said everything was still being processed so they couldn’t give you an update. Looking at your damaged car every day had just been keeping the memories fresh, so Jared had insisted that you just let your insurance deal with it and get the guy to pay it back after the fact.

“It’s better to get it taken care of so you don’t have the reminder,” he told you. “I’ll pay for the whole thing out of pocket if I have to. I just don’t want you to have to deal with it anymore.”

A little smile formed on your face at the memory. You took another bite of popcorn and snuggled deeper into Jared’s side. The two of you had spent the majority of the day just lounging around the house watching Netflix and eating junk food. It was bliss. You never felt more loved or cherished than when you were in Jared’s arms.

Jared felt you shift and ran his hand up and down your arm before placing a kiss on the top of your head. You glanced up at him. The two of you smiled at each other briefly before turning your attention back to the show.

A few minutes passed in silence before the sound of your phone ringing ruined the peaceful moment.

Jared lifted his arm, and you leaned forward to retrieve your phone off of the coffee table. The phone number on the screen was not one you knew, but it was local. So you decided to answer it anyway.

“Hello?”

“Miss Y/L/N?” a distinctly male voice said from the other end of the line.

A pit of unease settle in your stomach as you answered. “This is her.”

“This is Officer Garrett with the Austin PD.”

Jared noticed the way your back suddenly straightened, and he sat up a bit straighter himself before reaching for the remote. You signaled him that it was fine for him to keep watching the show without you.

“Oh,” you said as you rose to your feet. “I’ve been waiting for your call.” Placing your hand over the receiver, you mouthed to Jared that it was the officer who had taken your statement after the attack. Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest, and it was all you could do to keep from  hyperventilating. A combination of both excitement and fear ran through you as he started explaining what the investigation had yielded. The more he spoke, the more uneasy you felt. You had a bad feeling about what was coming, so you quickly turned and made your way to the kitchen so Jared wouldn’t see your distress. You could always just tell him about it later once you’d had a chance to process whatever it was the officer was going to tell you. Right now you weren’t sure you could deal with his frustrations on top of your own.

He watched you as you made your retreat with baited breath. He wanted to hear the conversation badly. You’d spent the morning checking your phone every so often for missed calls encase you missed the call from the police. It was what had inspired him to suggest the Netflix day. He knew you needed to get your mind off of everything, and a day of relaxing and binge watching that series you’d both been meaning to watch sounded like the perfect opportunity. It had worked, but he’d seen the tension come back into your body the instant you had answered the phone. A pit formed in the bottom of his own stomach as he thought about how long you had been waiting for this call. He knew you still didn’t feel completely safe. You didn’t say anything, but he could see it in the way your body tensed any time a red truck appeared on the road or how you still clung to him so tightly in your sleep that he was afraid you were going to rip his shirt to shreds.

Jared strained to hear your conversation, but he couldn’t make out what you were saying. He quickly grabbed the remote and switched off the television.

“Okay,” your voice floated in from the other room.

There was something in the way your voice sounded that made his throat constrict. Rising to his feet, he started moving towards the kitchen. He didn’t care if you would get upset with him for eavesdropping on your conversation anymore. The need to know what had caused the slightly high pitched tremble in your voice was too great. He’d worked incredibly hard to make you feel safe and secure over the last few weeks, and he wanted to continue to do that for you if needed.

“Alright,” you said as he came around the corner. Your back was to him as you leaned against the counter. “Thank you for calling, Officer. I really appreciate it. I will. Bye.”

You disconnected the call and placed your phone on the counter, taking a few deep breaths. Jared didn’t say anything when he came into the room, but you knew he was there. You could feel him just standing a few feet away just watching you, waiting for you to tell him what had happened.

“There won’t be any charges,” you said in a cold emotionless voice without turning around. The same eerie numbness that had taken over your body during the initial attack had seeped back into your body the instant the officer had told you that nothing was to come of what had happened to you. There was nothing. No feeling. No sensation, just a hyper awareness of everything that was going on around you. You could practically feel the emotions rolling off of Jared as he stood behind you. You knew you should turn around and discuss this with him, but something inside of you told you not to. It would shatter the protective spell your mind had woven around you, and you weren’t ready for that.  You didn’t want to look at Jared. There would be a look of pity and sadness on his face that would make it all too real. You weren’t ready to deal with that yet.

Jared took a step towards you but didn’t reach out to touch you. He could tell you had more to say.

“Since they didn’t catch him actually operating the vehicle they can’t prove it was him. So they have to let it go.”

“What?” Jared was stunned. How could they possibly just drop it. You’d gotten his tag number. Both you and Danneel had told the officer what had happened. He had seen how scared both of you were. Why would you make that up? “That’s bullshit!”

You jumped at the forcefulness in his voice. It wasn’t directed at you. You knew that, but it broke you from your haze and a whirlwind of emotions started running through your mind. You could feel the walls starting to close in around you, and it scared you. There was nothing either of you could do to rectify the situation or prevent it from happening again. He continued to speak. The ire in his words is what finally forced you to turn and look at him however. There was a dejected expression on your face that tore at him more than it would have if you had been crying.

“He told me there was a chance this could happen when I gave my statement,” you said, your voice completely devoid of emotion. “If they don’t catch him operating the vehicle it is nearly impossible to prove he was the one driving it. So even if it was his vehicle, he may not have been the one driving it. It becomes our word against his, and that just gets messy. So they dropped it.”

Jared could barely believe the words that were coming out of your mouth. You’d been so terrified that you’d had nightmares every night for days afterwards. You fought going to sleep even when he was holding you, because they had been so vivid. He had seriously considered getting you some sleeping pills just so you could get some rest. The thought that the man who put you through all of this, through hell, would get away scott free was completely unacceptable to him. He was about to tell you just that until you looked up into his eyes. What he saw there made him freeze.

There was clear disappointment on your face, but what caught his attention more than anything else was the wariness in your eyes. One of the first things he had noticed upon meeting you was the fire in your eyes. Now all he saw was defeat and despair. It made the breath catch in his throat as he took a step closer to you, placing a comforting hand on your arm.

“I just want to put it behind me,” you said before looking away so that the wounded expression Jared wore for you couldn’t make you cry. Crying made you feel weak, and you were tired of it. You wanted your life back. You wanted the peace that this asshole had stolen from you. You wanted to lay your head down at night and dream about the future you had with Jared. Not about what some random stranger had done to you.

Jared sensed your need for comfort and pulled you against his chest as you continued to speak.

“I don’t want to think about it anymore. I just want to get my car back and forget this ever happened.”

He placed a kiss to the top of  your head. “Okay. We’ll let it go. As long as you’re okay.”

You nodded into his chest and told him you were fine. This is what you wanted. To just move forward. Jared wasn’t sure he believed you, at least not fully. He’d watched you prepare to fight tooth and nail in the past to protect someone you loved. If you were willing to let your voice be heard over something that didn’t directly involve you, surely you would do the same for this. But that didn’t matter now. You said you didn’t want to pursue it, and he wasn’t willing to force you. So he tightened his arms around you and prayed that everything would work out for the best.

* * *

“I’m headed over to the bar to meet with the guys for a bit,” Jared said as you stepped out of the car. You leaned your head back through the open door to finish your conversation before collecting your vehicle. “I’ll pick up the twins after that and meet you and JJ at the house.”

“Okay,” you said, giving him a radiant smile. “Love you.”

“Love you too.”

Closing the door, you took a step back and gave Jared a little wave as he drove off before going into the office to collect your keys and pay for the damages.

It felt wonderful to have your car again. They hadn’t even had the car for a week, but driving around in anything other than your baby just didn’t feel right. Even driving Jared’s SUV was weird. It didn’t handle the same way, and it made you feel like you were driving a freaking land yacht instead of a car. You usually only drove it if you were going to have JJ and the twins with you. Taking it to the store to pick up a gallon of milk was just wrong.

A sigh of contentment left you when you saw them bring your car around. It looked shiny and new, no traces of your misadventure left to mar it’s beautiful vainer or remind you of the terrors you had faced. Getting behind the wheel of your own car felt wonderful. You were so caught up in the joy of having your car again that you completely forgot about the route you were taking to JJ’s school until the on ramp for the highway came into view. You froze. Every moment you had lived that night, and the nightmares that had followed, suddenly flashed before your eyes. Your heart started to beat wildly inside of your chest when your breathing grew shallow at the thought of driving that street again.

Taking a quick look at the clock, you saw that you still had plenty of time to make it across town to JJ’s school. You glanced over your left shoulder to check that the coast was clear before moving into the other lane. The muscles in you neck tensed to the point of near pain. You struggled to keep your breathing in check as the exit grew closer and closer with each passing second. You reminded yourself that JJ was waiting for you. She was depending on you, and you couldn’t let her down. For a moment, you were tempted to just close your eyes and wait for it to be over, but you didn’t have that option. So you kept them glued to the road and tried to focus as best you could. Your muscles relaxed as you sagged back against the seat once the exit had passed. You knew it was cowardly to avoid the highway. There was no reason to believe that anything was going to happen to you just because you took the same road, but you couldn’t bring yourself to drive it. Not yet.

The back way took longer than you had expected, and you arrived at JJ’s school just as they were finishing for the day. A large red truck pulled in several spaces down from you as you reached for the door handle. A cold shiver of fear ran down your spine. It wasn’t until you saw a woman exit the vehicle, and not the man who had attacked you, that you started breathing again

‘It’s okay, Y/N,’ you told yourself. ‘He’s not looking for you. It was completely random. Just get it together.’

Your little pep talk didn’t do much to bolster your confidence, but it allowed you a moment to gather yourself before going inside to collect your honorary niece. The last thing you needed was for JJ to see you terrified and wonder what was going on. Children notice a lot more than most adults gave them credit for. You didn’t want to give JJ anything more to pick up on than she would already, not with the loose lips she inherited from her father.

* * *

Running a hand across his mouth, Jared stopped pacing for a moment to glance at the clock. You and JJ should have been home 20 minutes ago. He thought seriously about calling you again, but decided against it. Traffic had been a bit heavier than normal when he’d left the bar. Maybe you just got stuck in traffic. Yeah. That had to be it. It was just the traffic.

Jared stuck his head into the main room and found the twins still fast asleep in their bouncy chairs. They looked so peaceful as they dreamt that he couldn’t help but smile at them.

Jensen and Danneel had asked the two of you to watch the kids overnight so that they could have some much needed Mommy/Daddy time. He still couldn’t help but snort in laughter at the memory of your mocking porn music noises that made both Ackleses blush slightly.

“Just wait until you two have kids of your own.” Jensen had teased. “Then you’ll know what we’re talking about.”

You’d blushed and hid your face behind Jared’s bicep at that point. His smile started to grow when he heard the familiar sound of the door to the garage opening and closing followed by tiny feet trotting through the house.

“Uncle Jared!” he heard JJ yell as she came around the corner.

With a huge smile plastered on his face, Jared squatted down and scooped the little girl into his arms. “Hey Jaybird. Where’s your Aunt Y/N?”

“I’m right here.”

He looked up just as you walked in, placing your purse on a nearby table. You sauntered up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder before rising onto your tiptoes to meet his lips in a quick welcome home kiss.

“What took you so long?” Jared asked.

You returned yourself to a flat footed stance and quickly turned away and made yourself busy with the mail. “There was a wreck,” you said. “It had traffic backed up for miles.”

“Yeah,” JJ offered. “We couldn’t get to the ice cream place.”

That caught Jared’s attention. Ice cream place? He racked his brain for a moment and couldn’t come up with one near the highway. Looking at the young girl in his arms he asked her, “What ice cream place?”

“The one that puts the chocolate on top,” she said excitedly.

His brow furrowed in confusion for a moment before his eyes went wide in realization. JJ had to be talking about the Dairy Queen on Stassney. Anytime she wanted to go there she’d ask for the ice cream with the chocolate on it. He looked over at you and saw that you were clearly ignoring him by walking into the kitchen. He didn’t know what to think. There was no reason for you to go that way unless the highway was closed, and he knew for a fact that it was open. Something had to be wrong.

“JJ,” he said as he placed her on the floor, “why don’t you go play for a bit while your Aunt Y/N and I make dinner okay?”

“Okay Uncle Jared.”

She went skipping from the room, humming a little tune while she went. Jared made sure she was out of earshot before following you into the kitchen. You’d already set about pulling vegetables and things out of the pantry to make stir-fry. He stood there for a few minutes waiting for you to acknowledge his presence, but you just went from gathering ingredients to chopping vegetables without bothering to look at him.

“What’s wrong?” Jared asked, not bothering to beat around the bush.

You just kept chopping vegetables. “Nothing.” The word was no sooner out of your mouth than you knew it was pointless. Jared had always been able to see right through you. You could never hid anything from him.

“You said it took you so long to get home because of a wreck.”

“There was a wreck,” you said. It wasn’t a lie. Somebody had been t-boned turning out of the Dairy Queen parking lot, and it had caused one hell of a slowdown.

“And that’s why you went almost two miles out of your way, so you would pass JJ’s favorite ice cream place?”

You placed the knife on the table with a sigh. You didn’t even have to look at Jared to know that he’d crossed his arms over his chest and was giving you a “don’t fuck with me” stare. It was all there in the tone of his voice.

“No,” you said.

“Then what was it?” Jared was fairly sure he knew the answer, but he wanted to hear you say it. You couldn’t just ignore things like the never happened and wait for them to go away. You had to face them. “Why not just take the highway like you always do?”

“Because I didn’t want to get on the highway, alright!”

You hadn’t meant to shout at him. It had just happened. You’d been wound like a top since you first saw that sign on the way to the school.

“What?” Jared was baffled. He wasn’t sure what answer he had expected, but it surely wasn’t that.

Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes to help gather your thoughts before telling your boyfriend everything. “I couldn’t do it,” you begin. “I meant to get on it when I left the auto shop, but I saw the signs, and I couldn’t do it. All I could think about was the fact that that guy is still out there, and then the nightmare started running through my head and…”

Jared saw you start to hyperventilate and quickly crossed the space between you.

“Hey. Hey,” he said as he ran a hand up and down your arm. “It’s okay.”

He pulled you into his arms and started thinking back to the times you had driven in the last few weeks. Each time it had only been to run somewhere nearby. Anything that required going across town you had insisted he drive.

Your voice drew him back out of his thoughts.

“It was like I couldn’t breath. Just thinking about it makes me…”

“You still haven’t been on the highway have you?” You shook your head no. He put you at arm’s length and waited for you to look up into his eyes before he continued. “Tell you what. Tomorrow, after we drop of the kids… you and I are going for a drive. I’ll be right there beside you, and any time you feel like you can’t do it you just take my hand and I’ll tell you how well you’re doing. How does that sound?”

The thought of being on the highway again made your stomach churn. You were afraid that it would always be a reminder of how close you and Danneel had come to losing it all. A lump formed in your throat, and you moved closer to Jared so that he could hold you. You didn’t want to face that fear, but knowing that Jared would be there beside you made it seem like it was something you could manage.

He didn’t say anything else. There was no need. Jared just held you and ran a soothing hand through your hair to calm you. It was a gesture that had always worked in the past, and he let out a silent prayer of thanks when he felt it work once again. You had told him you were fine. It was clear from looking at you now that it was not the case. You weren’t fine yet, but he was going to do all he could to get you there.

* * *

They thanked you one final time for taking their kids for the night before you made your way out the door. Walking back out to the car, you tried to climb into the passenger seat, but Jared put a hand on the door to keep you from opening it. You looked up at him and found him dangling the keys in front of you.

“You’re driving,” he said. He hated himself for forcing this on you, but he wasn’t sure that the two of you had the time to let you come to it on your own. There would come a time when you would have no other choice but to face it. What if he wasn’t there when it happened? What if you had to go through it all alone because he was away at a convention or on set? You were strong. He knew you would manage on your own if you had to, but he didn’t want you to have to do it alone. It had taken a lot for you to really let him in at the beginning of your relationship. You’d been burned because of that in the past. He wanted you to know that he would always be there to support you no matter what. He wasn’t going to see your feelings as silly or insignificant and push you off to the side. He was there for you. Always.

The previous night’s conversation replayed itself in your mind, filling you with dread. You knew he wasn’t going to let you just drive home to make lunch or take the side streets to get to the restaurant. He would make you get on the highway whether you liked it or not. You opened your mouth to protest, but he just raised his eyebrows in challenge, practically daring you to fight back. You huffed before reaching up to take the keys from his hand.

“Fine,” you grumbled in frustration. You knew that Jared was just trying to help. You loved him for that. He could see right through to the heart of you and tell what you needed even when you didn’t know yourself. You just wished he wasn’t so good at it sometimes.

Time seemed to run in slow motion as you moved around the car to the driver’s side door and opening it to let yourself in. You fastened your seatbelt and placed the key in the ignition.

“Are you sure we can’t just go home?” you asked.

Jared shook his head. “Don’t even try it.” While his voice may have sounded sure, he felt anything but confident that this was the right course of action. There were so many factors at play here. There was no way he could know how it would turn out. You having an uncontrollable panic attack in the middle of the highway was a real possibility, but it was one he would have to risk. It was better for you to have one with him beside you than to be forced to face this later and go through it all alone.

You turned the key and listened to the engine come to life. Backing out of the driveway, you took a left and headed out of the neighborhood. The sign indicating the on ramp for the highway soon came into view, and you started to feel that same uneasy pit in the bottom of your stomach that you had the day before.

The unease you felt seeped from your pores and settled into the atmosphere. Jared could practically feel your heart hammering against your ever tightening chest.

“Hey it’s okay,” he said as you made your way up the ramp. “I’m right here. You got this.”

You nodded but didn’t say a word. You just focused on the road in front of you and tried not to have a panic attack in the middle of the highway. Jared’s hand on you knee was a huge comfort. That tiny point of contact reminded you that you were not alone. He drew slow soothing circles with his thumb and kept encouraging you, telling you how wonderful and brave you were until you started to believe him. Soon, your exit came into view. “You’re almost there baby.”

All of the tension melted away the second you turned onto the exit and made your way away from the highway. You body actually went limp as soon as you put the car into park outside of the restaurant the two of you had picked for lunch.

“You did it, Y/N.” A smile spread across your face. “I’m proud of you.”

Jared pulled you into a tight hug, allowing you to sag against him. You were so thankful for him. Having his support through everything made it all so much easier. Now, knowing that he was with you and that you could conquer anything, you were ready to really and truly put the past behind you and move forward with nothing but love in your heart.

You let out a tiny chuckle and allowed the tears to fall unchecked down your face for the first time since you woke from your nightmare screaming. Only this time instead of tears of fear they were tears of you. You had gone through something awful that you would not wish on your worst enemy and had come out stronger on the other side. You had risen to the challenge that had been placed in front of you, and you were better for it. There was nothing you couldn’t face in that moment as long as Jared was with you. His strength and reassurance was what got you through this, and it would see you both through many trials to come.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave kudos and comments. Thank you.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments and kudos.


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